Lauren Christ
Stories from the Axe and Thistle is a bi-monthly serialization that details the exploits of a D&D 5e campaign as they troll their way through an open-world wilderness. Often outlandish and good for a laugh, these vignettes are told by the Dungeon Master of said campaign, because sometimes humor is the only way to cope with tragedy!
Click here to see the previous installment.
Preamble:
The map the bartender rolls out in front of you is impossibly detailed, full of hand-drawn mountains and forests and semi-comical depictions of monsters. Some of the places on the map are labeled “treasure”, “rest house”, “haunted”, and one just says “no” in suspiciously red letters. Your eyes land on the small circle in the very center, labeled “Varna” in cursive handwriting.
“I don’t know if you know this,” the bartender says, placing a finger on the dot, “But the town hasn’t really been here all that long. It was founded, like, twenty-something years ago by a wizard named Varn. He gave the town his name, a strong push, and then disappeared into the forest. No one’s seen him since. You might think that’s strange if you’d never met a wizard before.”
“I do find it strange,” you concede.
“Well, Varn was the real deal. Varn the Oathbreaker is one of his monickers. Varn the Defiler is another. I’ve never met him, in truth, but I’ve heard enough stories to know he got pretty famous for doing reckless and horrible things just to prove he could. He made a lot of enemies back in civilization, which is probably why he opened the portal in the first place. At least, I think he opened the portal. He was the first to go through it, anyway.” Her eyes dart to the door, and she lowers her voice. “He was in trouble with a lot of people for some pretty serious stuff, the kind of stuff people in power would kill you for, if they could catch you.”
“So, Varn made it so they couldn’t catch him.”
She nods. “The portal only works the one way, so if anyone important, like a church inquisitor or a priest or anybody else, were to come through it, they wouldn’t be able to bring him back. They’d have to be satisfied with coming here to kill him themselves, which is damn near impossible. Nevarnost would kill them first, or the man himself.”
“It’s really that dangerous?” you ask, “I mean, out here?”
She nods furiously. “Oh, yeah. If you were thinking about venturing out for a little adventure of your own, I wouldn’t go without some serious backup. Varn cast a spell around the town, a ward that repels the things that live in the woods,so it’s safe here and literally nowhere else. At least, nowhere else I’ve been, anyway.”
“Have you gone on adventures?”
The bartender gives you a small, tight smile. “That’s a story for another day. We’re talking about you now.”
You shake your head, suddenly very embarrassed. “No, we’re talking about Varn the wizard.”
She shrugs. “Alright, suit yourself. What else do you want to know?”
“Did he come here alone?”
The bartender looks around at the empty taproom for a second, and like before, she lowers her voice as she says, “No, he didn’t. And again, I never met the guy, understand me, but I have it on good authority he brought his crew with him. Back home, when people would tell stories about him, he was always with the same two people. I don’t know their names, sorry to say, but I know one was this big, hulking bruiser of a guy and the other was some kind of princess, I think.”
“And has anyone come to try and find him? From the church, or whoever is after him.”
She laughs at your question. “Oh, yeah, someone came through to kill Varn, alright. He’s still here actually, upstairs.” She points with her finger and a flick of her wrist. “Real funny guy, that one. Let me get you another beer, you’re going to want to wash this story down with something.”
To be continued…
Stay tuned as we upload a new chapter of the campaign every other week right here on DorkDaily.com!
